Potty Training @ 7 months..what??!!

Today is the first day Diego went potty with no misses! I am so excited! Last time I felt this excited was waiting in line to see Santigold in concert, dang how my life has changed! Now my excitement comes from a baby peeing in the toilet, I love it! So yea, I started potty training, or as I like to call it, "diaper freeing Diego" with no real coaching or knowledge of what I was doing. I just sat with him on the potty every morning and he miraculously went potty! I did find that turning on the faucet while sitting on the toilet does the trick. I tried without the water and we sat on the potty for 10 minutes with nothing, then faucet on, pee comes right out, amazing! At first he looked at me like what the hell are you doing to me?! But after a few tries he knew what he had to do. It is so cool watching my boy pee and poop in the potty. I no longer have to deal with a diaper rash, and I know Diego is happy too! Who wants to sit in their poop and pee all day? Not me! Don't get me wrong it's not the easiest thing in the world, especially at night, but if you're dedicated and in tune with your little one then you can totally do it.

Nonetheless, I have had an array of criticism for potty training my lil one, especially from family. My dad thinks I'm insane and my mom was skeptical at the idea at first but once she saw Diego doing his thing, she was amazed, "Ay Dios Mio! He's peeing in the toilet!" she yelled. My brother calls me a hippie, but is impressed by my dedication. And of course my man loves it, and helps out whenever he's home. The more pee in the toilet, equals less diapers, and less money, and less trash for mother earth! I'm excited for the day we are completely diaper free!

Pregnant with ideas...

As you may have all read, I am no longer pregnant with my son. But I feel that the title of my blogs, Chicana and pregnant still represents my mind as being pregnant with ideas and thoughts, opinions and beliefs. I will continue to post my experiences as a brown mujer with a radical mind set. I will discuss my beliefs, my family, all things related to being chicana and pregnant. I hope you all continue to follow and please comment and give opinions!

Peace and love!

To baptize or not to baptize?

So here we go again...my parents have been pressuring me and my man to baptize our son in the Catholic church. We are both culturally Catholic but have consciously drifted from the religion because of all its false teachings and pedophilia that goes on within the church. WE identify ourselves as spiritualist and love is our religion. However my parents feel that we are irresponsible sinners who do not want to commit our lives and sacrifice for "the lord" blah blah. My mother is extremely worried that we are raising our child without the fear of gods wrath which in her mind means that our son is going to be fearless and live a life of sin. Does this make sense?

Anyway, so my mother and father have threatened to take my son without my consent, literally behind my back, and baptize him. My mother stated that she would rather die than have her grandchild unbaptized! A little extreme don't you think?But it is understandable, my grandmother was a devout Catholic; however she actually lived by gods word. She was a beautiful soul who never judged anyone, she lived in peace and helped others. Aside from being brutally beaten on a daily basis by my grandfather, she was able to see the light at the end of the tunnel and still be a kind hearted and generous soul, all of which she owed to god. I admired her for her religious beliefs, because she followed them and was not hypocritical.

My father on the other hand is pushing us to baptize our son because he knows nothing else; he is set in his beliefs because that's the way he was raised. Wait never mind, he was raised as a Christian with an alcoholic mother who never took them to church. Maybe that's why he wants to baptize our son, he wants what he never had? Hm, sorry I was thinking aloud. Nevertheless, regardless of my parents reasoning, I don't think they have the right to threaten to take my son behind our backs and baptize him. They didn't even ask us how we felt about this issue of baptizing our son. They just assumed that because we are not religious and are always bad mouthing the church and pedophilia, and patriarchy, and because we like to go to anti-war protest that we were not going to baptize our child. Okay so maybe they have a point, after all my partner and I did vow never to let our children near the Catholic church. But you know what, things change. Ah who am I trying to kid, we are slowly succumbing to the PRESSURE! And I mean PRESSURE! And not only from my parents, but from our whole family! My aunts and uncles, cousins, in-laws, damn even the asian neighbor asked when we were baptizing Diego!

So after a short discussion over some pale ales, my partner and I decided hey what the heck, lets just do it. Let's not think too much about this ritual and just go with the flow. We feel that the pressure is to much to withstand. And I'll be damed if my parents sneak behind my back and baptize MY son. I'd rather we do it ourselves and make the best of it along the way, con una fiesta y todo! Why not? Who cares about what we believe in right? Who cares about our strong anti-church beliefs? My parents don't; even though we respect their beliefs and way of living. It's all bull shit. I knew that when I would have children that my beliefs would be compromised and that I would succumb to the pressure of my family. Damn! Being Chicana and being anti-church is f***ing difficult. And not baptizing your child is the worse possible sin in a Catholics eyes.

So the moral of the story is: stay strong and fight for what you believe in, do not allow anyone compromise your beliefs and pressure you into doing what you don't believe in. Yeah right! If you're brown then good luck! Asi son las cosas, that's the way it is. I'd rather keep the peace and be happy then wage a war on the catholic church and mi familia. After all it's a good excuse for everyone to get wasted and have a good time, right?

I'll let you know when the bolo is!!

"Radical parenting," or as my mother likes to put it, "como los gringos!"

I like to carry my baby, all day. However, I never realized how troubling this is for my latino familia. "You're going to spoil that kid if you carry him around," "Don't pick him up when he cries or you'll spoil him," "It's good to let your baby cry out, it's good for his lungs and you don't spoil them." What the heck is wrong with you people! Of course I politely respond by saying that I do not believe in those theories of raising a baby. And of course people get offended. I had one aunt say to me, "Oh what are you gonna be like those white people and carry him around in one of those funny looking cloths?" What am I supposed to say to this ignorant question? And no matter how many times I try to educate them, they always end up with the same weird, confused look on their faces, as if I'm speaking a different language.

I remind them that our people in Mexico used to carry around their babies on their backs, before they were conquered. "But we are not in Mexico!" my mother once told me when I tried to explain my reasoning. The woman means well, after all she was raised with these same as I like to call them, "cruel theories." How can I leave my baby crying all for the sake of not spoiling him? Obviously he needs something; crying is his way of communicating his needs and wants to me. By ignoring those cries I am ignoring his needs. And lets not get into co-sleeping! People think I'm crazy when I say I sleep with my baby and plan to sleep with my child for as long as he wants.

My family has difficulty understanding my perspectives. At first I was shy and afraid to speak my mind, but then I realized that my family had no control over my child. I am his mother and I am going to do what is right for him, and that includes speaking out!

My father likes to call me a modern day hippy. I walk around the house wearing my wrap while my little one breast feeds. I use cloth diapers and bathe my baby using homemade soap. I try to avoid the doctor as much as possible and will not vaccinate my child. I had an all natural birth and plan on breast feeding my little one as long as I can. I sleep with my baby and run to him whenever he starts to cry. I plan on raising my child vegetarian and hope to homeschool him.

My brother likes to say I live like an Indian, I like to say I live like I am supposed to live: simply and peacefully. I'm not rich and do not want to be. If it were up to me I'd live off the land somewhere in Oregon, where I would raise animals and plant berries. =) Then they'd really call me "crazy!"

But let me be the first to say that it has been difficult caring for my baby the way I want to care for him. Society likes to impose their beliefs on you. But I'd rather be perceived as "crazy" than go with the mainstream. My family has much to learn about "radical parenting." Yet I don't believe it's radical at all. I see it as parenting that is based on love and respect for your child. I was raised with my mother yelling and screaming at me. I spent alot of my childhood feeling scared, insecure and alone. I do not want this for my child. And it begins with co-sleeping.

I love my familia but they drive me nuts with all their useless advice! Of course not all of it is useless, the elder women in my family have given me great advice on natural remedies, many of which come from our people in Mexico. Yet there is too much advice that I can live without hearing. I'd rather be known as "la loca de la familia" than go with their flow. So lesson to be learned, once ya'll have your babies, remember to be strong in your beliefs and do not let others try to compromise your beliefs by giving you false advice. Do your research and raise your little ones as you wish to. Go Radical Parenting!

Wow...I just had a baby! Naturally!!

Diego was born on January 22. The night before I watched the movie Away We Go, and dream of the day when we move to Oregon. I went to sleep dreaming of green meadows, and large trees, and my little farm and garden that I wish to have some day. I was dreaming peacefully when suddenly I had that dream where you feel like you're peeing and it feels all warm and cozy. I woke up with a jolt to realize that my underwear was wet. What the?! I went to the restroom and felt more liquid come down. Hmm, maybe its just discharge, I thought to myself and went back to bed. Once I lay down much more liquid came down, "oh shit" I said, "my water just broke." My partner heard me and suddenly woke up, "your what did what?!" he asked. I smiled and said, "I think my water just broke."

The next thing I did was wake up my mamma, (we're living with my folks until we are financially able to be on our own). I asked my mom if she thought my water had burst. Suddenly as I stood over my mamma and daddy in bed I felt my first contraction. "uh, yea, my labor is beginning!" I said. My mamma suddenly jumped out of bed, "go take a bath and I'll make you some tea," she said. My father yelled, "tea? shower? we gotta go now!" I laughed and told my father to relax, I figured REAL labor wouldn't begin for another few hours; boy was I wrong!!

My water broke at 4:45am and my contractions began shortly after, lasting a minute and apart a minute and a half! By the time I was finished taking a shower and drinking my tea I was clenching my fist and grinding my teeth, the REAL labor had begun. My partner drove me to the hospital in one of the worst storms of the year, while I screamed in pain. Once we arrived in the hospital my midwife asked, "so we're doing this all natural right?" "I don't know, this hurts alot!" I responded. By 9:38am that same morning I moaned and groaned, and yelled and screamed a 6lb baby boy out of my what used to be cute vagina. But it was all worth it!

And yes, I did it all naturally. It's so amazing what the women's body is capable of doing. Don't get me wrong there where moments when I felt like I was going to die, but thats called the transition phase, right before you're about to push. It's such a painful but beautiful process. I felt as my baby made his way thru the birth canal, with every push he got closer and closer to entering this world. I was lucky enough to have birthed with midwives, who not once offered me pain medication, rather they motivated me and encouraged me to go on. And yes, I did ask for pain medication at one point, it was during transition when I felt like I was going to die, but deep inside I knew that I did not want any drugs. My midwife was calm and peaceful, encouraging me to listen to my body and "go with it."

This is the way birthing is meant to be. If you are not "at risk" or have a complicated pregnancy then you should be allowed to birth naturally, and preferably at home, which I hope to do with my next little one. It makes me sad to think that so many women miss out on the beautiful experience of birth. It's you and your baby working together to bring him/her into this world. And no, I am not stronger than most women, I do not have any super powers. In fact, all my life I've been extremely fearful and weak when it comes to pain, or so I thought. Now I feel confident and powerful. Every women is capable of birthing naturally, this is what we were created for. WE need to empower ourselves and break the chains from doctors and what mainstream says birth should be like. So yea, I guess you can say I've become a free birth choice advocate, I can't help it, I want all women to experience a free birth, to have the control over their own bodies and that of their children. Si Se Puede! It can be done! The power is ours women, lets do it!